Me: I'm going back to Admin to use the assault copier.
Partner: The what?
Me: The High Capacity Fully Automatic Assault Copier, back in Admin, next to the High Capacity Fully Automatic Assault Shredder.
Partner (retired Air Force NCO): You Army guys are weird.
Me: You're just jealous because you weren't in the military.
Note to current and former Zoomies everywhere: I mean that in the most affectionate, respectful way possible. Well, okay, not the most, that would be creepy.